February 2012
“So what will I say? I’ll tell them all- the angels. I got drunk in the...”
– Moritz
i’m not numb anymore
things feel real again
i’ve never felt so sad
i’m not empty
it’s the opposite
i feel heavy
i called my mom but i pretended to be okay. i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i told myself that i would be honest
but i didnt know how to tell her that i’m just so sad and so tired
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plasticwrapkisses replied to your post: i literally just spend all my time annoying anyone…
what the frack my friend, you make my dash better, not worse. Much, much better. Because you’re an awesome person, so consequently the stuff you post is awesome. So…you shouldn’t delete. I love you!!!
I love you too <3
And I don’t think I’ll delete. This blog is the only way I can...
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allwasteandvoid replied to your post: allwasteandvoid replied to your post: i literally…
i very seriously doubt you annoy everyone. i feel like that 99% of the time but i’m sure i’m just beating myself up for no good reason. feel better
thanks <3
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allwasteandvoid replied to your post: i literally just spend all my time annoying anyone…
no don’t :(
i just don’t know what to do anymore. i just feel like i annoy everyone and i cant help it but i realize later and i just dont want to be like this
i literally just spend all my time annoying anyone and posting so much adds to it and i’m really sorry you guys. i think i might delete or something because all this is pointless. im just too erratic and moody for anything to work out. its time. i give up.
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i meant it when i said i never cry
go figure i would break on the one day i wear makeup
i just feel like being done
my acting class is going to go horribly because i couldnt do the script analysis paper and my scene is going to be so bad
my understanding movies class is okay actually
but my pop culture class is horrible and my group hates me because im too erratic and moody to contribute and i annoy them
im just really annoying
i need to stop
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my psychology teacher in high school once told the whole class to not be friends with someone who is bipolar and that statement is something i think about all the time. i seriously worry that he was right to warn people like that.
fun fact: i’ve recently discovered that i have borderline personality disorder
it all makes sense. the way i have complete breakdowns if i think someone is ignoring me. my inability to do well in school because there’s no immediate reward. general feelings of emptiness. general disassociation. my tendency to hang out with people for an intense and short amount of time (like with will)...
i feel like i’ve possibly started to forget faces that i don’t see on a daily basis
this has been the worst and weirdest weekend of my life
im really not excited to continue living if this is how its going to be
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iankhalil answered your question: if anyone has or has had derealization and…
Just remehmber that dale and laura made it to the white lodge through it all. There are things you’ll find that are stronger than pain.
this is the best thing. you are an awesome, awesome person :)
hey portland state
you know that whole using memes in every single poster you put up thing thats been going on
well
you need to stop
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things i enjoy:
being annoyingly nice to people who are trying to fight with me
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the HUGE issue i have with insomnia is i realize that there is such thing as too much time and i end up not knowing what to do with myself
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that moment where you look at the clock and realize its 6 am and you just wrote a chapter and a half of a book in two hours is a really nice one
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sangeeta's official 'how to remember that life is...
to be listened to in this order because there are depressing songs that allow you to be sad but you have to keep listening or skip ahead because there are a lot of encouraging songs too:
‘the breakdown’ by alexz johnson
‘hey jude’ by the beatles
‘will i?’ from rent
‘21 guns’ the american idiot musical version
”doll parts’ by hole
...
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i read the book ‘thirteen reasons why’ i think about five years ago and the premise of that is something i think about on a daily basis
it’s been quite the day for anons here at nojudgementsjustpie
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